Most of us know the story of Jezebel and Ahab, and the harm she caused among God’s people. People with a Jezebel spirit often bring chaos through manipulation and control. In this post, I’ll share my personal experience with this spirit, how it works, and what I’ve learned. These traits are often hidden and hard to spot at first—until you’re already deep into it. Let’s talk about how to recognize and protect yourself from it.
Understanding Jezebel: A Spirit of Control and Manipulation
Jezebel was the wife of King Ahab in the Bible, known for leading Israel into idol worship and using lies and manipulation to get her way. She had many of God’s prophets killed and forced others to hide to escape her anger. If you want to learn more, I recommend reading from 1 Kings 18. Her story shows just how destructive and controlling this spirit can be, and it’s something we still see in people today.
Recognizing Jezebel’s Entitlement and Setting Boundaries
Jezebel spirits often feel entitled to your time, money, or resources, as if you owe them something. I’ve dealt with this myself, especially with a family member who got upset when I didn’t give her my attention. It wasn’t that I was acting differently—I’m just someone who enjoys my alone time (call it being an introvert, if you will). Every time I was around her, she had a negative attitude and would lecture me about how I should be spending more time with the family. But why should I sacrifice my own well-being just to meet someone else’s expectations?
This sense of entitlement is a clear sign of a controlling attitude. When someone makes you feel like you owe them your time, energy, or anything else, they are trying to control you. Often, this behavior stems from unresolved issues, like insecurity or emotional struggles, that they need to work through. It’s the same kind of entitlement Jezebel displayed when she took Naboth’s vineyard in the Bible. If you face this behavior, it’s crucial to set clear boundaries. If they keep pushing, it’s a sign of a deeper problem, and you may need to distance yourself—especially when they already know your character but are trying to get what they want at your expense.
Recognizing Emotional Manipulation: A Jezebelic Trait
Another trait of a Jezebel spirit is the manipulation of emotions to get what they want. Jezebel spirits can use any emotion—anger, sadness, or victimhood—to manipulate others and achieve their goals.
In the Bible, we see Jezebel using emotional manipulation when she threatened Elijah with death. After Elijah defeated the prophets of Baal, Jezebel sent him an angry message, saying she would have him killed by the next day. This threat was meant to intimidate and control Elijah through fear.
We also see Ahab, Jezebel’s husband, displaying a trait often seen in Jezebelic dynamics—sulking. When he couldn’t get Naboth’s vineyard, Ahab became sullen and refused to eat (1 Kings 21:4). He let his emotional state influence his behavior, hoping someone would pity him and give him what he wanted. This sulking is a form of manipulation, trying to use sadness or dissatisfaction to get others to act on your behalf.
I experienced something called “dry begging” with an individual. Dry begging occurs when someone subtly hints or expresses dissatisfaction, making it seem like they need something from you without directly asking. This emotional manipulation makes you feel guilty or obligated, leaving no clear option to say yes or no. If you encounter this, recognize the manipulation, rebuke the behavior, and distance yourself from the person. It’s important to remove yourself from such spirits before they corrupt you with their toxic behaviors.
Creating Conflict: How the Jezebel Spirit Uses Lies and Manipulation to Control
Jezebel spirits often create false drama to turn others against you. In 1 Kings 21, Jezebel fabricated a false accusation against Naboth. She orchestrated a fake trial, using false witnesses to accuse him of blasphemy, which led to his execution. She did this to remove someone who stood in her way.
These spirits often plant seeds of doubt in others’ minds by spreading lies or inventing situations to manipulate them into viewing you negatively. This is why God urges us to guard our hearts—this spirit is destructive. A psychological term similar to this is “narcissistic projection,” where a narcissist paints you as the “bad guy” in order to turn their loyal followers, or “flying monkeys,” against you.
The Manipulative Power of Jezebelic Spirits: Seduction and Control
An example of a Jezebelic spirit using seduction can be found in the story of Delilah and Samson (Judges 16). Delilah was hired by the Philistine rulers to uncover the secret of Samson’s strength. She used charm and seductive tactics to wear Samson down with persistent questioning and manipulation until he finally revealed the source of his strength. Once she had what she wanted, Delilah betrayed him, leading to his capture.
In this context, seduction isn’t limited to physical allure; it also involves charm, flattery, and emotional manipulation to achieve selfish goals. This can include using charm to gain influence, offering sexual favors, or dressing provocatively to create temptation. Proverbs 5:3-5 warns against such deceptive behavior and highlights the destructive consequences of seduction.
A modern example of this can be seen in the secular music industry, where the phrase “sex sells” is often used. Explicit images, provocative language, and overly sexual performances are marketed to attract audiences. I recall growing up and mindlessly singing along to these songs, captivated by the beats and instrumentals. It wasn’t until adulthood that I truly listened to the lyrics and realized I shouldn’t have been repeating such things at 12 years old. This is one way the enemy subtly influences people, leading them to unknowingly curse themselves. Isn’t the devil crafty?
Anyone who claims to be pursuing God’s heart yet participates in the corruption of this industry is not truly worshiping the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Israel.
The Jezebel Spirit: How Jezebels Undermine and Control Through Manipulation
They make you feel incompetent through gaslighting, dismissing your thoughts as nonsense, mocking you, and making you feel small. They do this to wound you while elevating themselves, asserting dominance. Jezebels often attach themselves to people with power, divine favor, or intelligence—not just to control and hurt them but also to use their influence and authority for their own gain.
In 1 Kings 21, Jezebel belittles King Ahab for being upset over Naboth’s refusal to sell his vineyard. She mocks him, saying, “Is this how you act as king? Get up, eat, and cheer up! I’ll get you the vineyard.” Jezebel undermines Ahab’s authority to assert her dominance and uses his power as king to execute her selfish plan.
Additionally, Jezebels often cling to people-pleasers—those who don’t stand up for themselves or exhibit a passive-aggressive spirit (often referred to as the “Ahab spirit”). These individuals are easier to manipulate and control, allowing the Jezebel to maintain power and dominance.
Recognizing Manipulation: When People Use Guilt and Deception
Anyone who says, “I’ve done so much for you, and now I’m asking you to do this for me, and you won’t do it,” is operating in sin. This type of manipulation is rooted in selfishness and control. You should never do something against your will, nor should you manipulate someone else into doing something against theirs. True relationships grow through mutual respect, not coercion or guilt.
Another form of manipulation is hiding important information because you know the person would say no if they had all the facts. This tactic was used by the serpent in the Garden of Eden. In Genesis 3:4–5, the serpent deceived Eve by withholding the full truth: “You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman, “for God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” If the serpent had told Eve that eating the forbidden fruit would lead to being cast out of the garden and experiencing hardship, do you think she would have disobeyed? This deceitful behavior shows a lack of respect for another person’s autonomy and ability to make informed decisions.
As the Bible says in Matthew 5:37, “Let your yes be yes, and your no be no; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.” It’s important to stand firm in your boundaries and never let others use your kindness as leverage to manipulate you. Remember, God calls us to act out of love, not obligation or manipulation.
In Closing
I hope you found The Jezebel Spirit: How It Manipulates and Controls God’s People helpful. The things I write are meant to encourage self-reflection and growth. We all have a part in these behaviors, myself included, and I hope this helps you examine your character and make the necessary changes. If you have any questions or need further insight, feel free to reach out.
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