The Best Version Of Yourself Will Look Stuck Up To The Unhealed

Many people believe that simply going to church, professing to be a believer, and picking up the Bible here and there means they are on the right path and right with Yah. But if that were true, the Pharisees, who regularly visited the temple, preached the law of Moses, fasted, and prayed, would have recognized that Yahusha (Jesus) was sent by our Heavenly Father. Instead, they couldn’t wait for Jesus to be crucified. If they were as close and holy to Yah as they claimed, wouldn’t they have seen the truth?

Being a true believer is about more than just looking the part. It’s about doing the inner work, healing wounds, establishing healthy boundaries, standing in your God-given power, and walking with Yah. Trust me when I say this: when you get there, the best version of yourself will look stuck up to the unhealed.

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Getting to the Best Version of Myself

What Does It Mean to Be the Best Version of Yourself?

It means recognizing that you are imperfect. You acknowledge your flaws and understand that there are areas in your life that need work. You become self-aware, realizing that you have issues you cannot overcome on your own, but with the help of Yahusha, you can find healing and growth. Because of this, you seek Him—through prayer, the Word, guidance, and even therapy. You seek to understand yourself more deeply and confront the generational curses passed down in your bloodline.

Recognizing these curses, you desire to be different. You yearn to break the chains that have bound your family members, those same patterns that have kept them in bondage. You’ve witnessed the poor decisions made by your parents or family and have determined within yourself not to fall into those same traps. You’re no longer afraid of correction from mentors or those God sends to help you grow, knowing that true learning and growth require conviction and chastisement.

You are humble, disciplined, and seek knowledge, wisdom, and understanding—not just to know yourself better, but to live in a way that reflects God. When you pursue growth in this way, Yah will lift you up. But with that promotion comes challenges.

Scripture Reference:

• Proverbs 12:1 – “Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but whoever hates correction is stupid.”
• Hebrews 12:6 – “For the Lord disciplines the one He loves, and chastises every son whom He receives.”
• Romans 12:2 – “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”

Recognizing the Unhealed Mindsets

When you begin to wake up to the truth, you start to see the world differently. You realize many people around you are stuck in patterns and don’t truly see things as they are. They were raised by people who never dealt with their own issues. As a result, they repeat the same cycles.

You understand that the people who are not awake are simply acting out of their default programming. This is when you begin to see them as “zombies”—walking through life, seeking the living to devour. They don’t realize the harm they cause. Instead, they try to dim your light by mocking, gossiping, judging, and criticizing.

Once you recognize this, you may feel the need to distance yourself to protect your energy. Staying close to those stuck in negative patterns can pull you down too. This self-preservation may lead others to think you’re acting superior, and they may try to humble you.

Anyone who hasn’t awakened or done the work to heal can become an obstacle to your growth. In some family or social systems, you may feel called to a higher purpose, but those closest to you may not understand and might hinder your God-given assignment. They become your enemy.

For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law; and a person’s enemies will be those of his own household.” — Matthew 10:35-36

Stuck Up or Confident? How Jesus Handled the Pharisees’ Jealousy

The story of Jesus and His interactions with the Pharisees shows how spiritually ‘dead’ people, lacking understanding, often respond out of jealousy. The Pharisees saw Him as a threat and believed He was being arrogant or ‘stuck up’ because He claimed to be the Son of God and forgave sins. They were so furious, they even wanted to stone Him.

Jealous of His growing influence, they tried to humble Him by questioning His actions and accusing Him of breaking the law. But their pride and inability to see the truth only showed how spiritually blind they were. Despite their attempts to bring Him down, Jesus stayed true to His mission, confident in who He was.

Reference: John 10:33-36 (NIV):“We are not stoning you for any good work,” they replied, “but for blasphemy, because you, a mere man, claim to be God.”

When You Don’t See Your Worth, But Others Do

This message is for those who’ve wondered why, even when you don’t seek trouble or cause any problems, there’s always a specific group of people—or even just one person—targeting you or trying to humble you. What you may not realize is that, while these people are spiritually blind or “dead,” they can still spot the living from a mile away. They see your talent, your gift, and your worth before you even do.

The Toxic Friendship That Showed Me My Worth

As a wise person once said, “It is dangerous when you don’t know who you are, but everyone else sees it,” because it puts a big target on your back. You’ll wonder why you’re being targeted, why you’re being pulled down.

I remember a time before I had a real relationship with God, when I attracted a very toxic friendship. This woman quickly attached herself to me, and after we became acquainted, she told me, “When I first met you, I thought you were stuck up, that you thought you were better.” I didn’t take it too seriously—it wasn’t the first time I’d heard something like that. But looking back, I see how unaware I was of my own worth, and how she noticed it immediately.

She spent years getting close to me, and slowly, passively tearing me down, all the while I made excuses for her behavior. I knew she’d come from a rough childhood, and I convinced myself that I needed to give her grace, that she needed love. But no matter how much I tried, I found myself shrinking, trying to make myself small so she could feel better about herself.

Breaking Free and Stepping Into the Light

Then, when God started to open my eyes, I realized something: if I wanted to become the best version of myself, I needed to stop being around people who weren’t comfortable with me shining. I had to let go of the dead things in my life—the toxic relationships, the situations holding me back. That’s when I understood that to grow, I had to leave the darkness behind and step into the light of who I truly am.

Things to Remember on Your Journey to Becoming the Best Version of Yourself

1. The Importance of Equal Connections

I once heard a therapist say, “You cannot have a close relationship with someone you feel sorry for,” and I completely agree. When you feel sorry for someone, it’s hard to have a genuine connection because you’re coming from a place of pity rather than equality. The Bible also tells us not to be unequally yoked. The best thing you can do is minister to them, pour in love and support, but then step away. You can plant good seeds, but ultimately, it’s up to them to decide whether they want to grow and elevate themselves or stay stagnant. Staying in their presence too long, especially if they’re not moving forward, can weigh you down.

2. Confrontation May Not Be the Answer

Secondly, when you become awakened, you may feel resentment and the urge to confront those who took advantage of your naivety when you didn’t see your own worth. But the question is—what’s the point? If you didn’t see it before, what makes you think the spiritually “dead” will? The only result of confronting them might be them twisting your words and throwing them back in your face.

As the Bible says in Matthew 7:6, “Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet and turn and tear you to pieces.” When you recognize the disrespect, focus on your healing and forgiveness. Use the insight gained from that relationship to empower yourself and others.

3. Responding to Hurt with Grace

Third, to piggyback off the second point, you may feel angry about how people who are supposed to love and care for you mishandled you. It’s okay to feel angry, but sin not. You have to remind yourself that they are babes in their spiritual walk, and as someone who is awakened, you are held to a higher standard. If you decide to lash out and retaliate, you put yourself in a bad spot with our Heavenly Father. Instead, pray for them so that God can help them see their wicked ways.

4. Self-Forgiveness and Growth

Fourth, forgive yourself for the things you didn’t know. Speak to yourself with kindness and say, “I will do better. I’m sorry.” It’s important to start building self-trust by following through on the promises you make to yourself. Guard and protect your peace—because you deserve it. Be kind to yourself, and trust that you will not repeat the same mistakes.

Surround Yourself with Those Who Lift You Up

Last but not least, nothing feels better than finding your people—those you don’t have to walk on eggshells around, who understand you and share your path. They are the ones who will boost your confidence. Surround yourself with them and build together.

I hope this post, The Best Version Of Yourself Will Look Stuck Up To The Unhealed was helpful to you. If you’d like to continue this journey with me, please subscribe and sign up for my newsletter. Your support means the world to me!